Perfectionism not only creates a barrier between us and our loved ones; it also limits the number of people we connect with. Instead of feeling at ease, warm, and open to connection in social situations, the self-judgment in perfectionism makes us want to avoid being around people because we know it’ll be exhausting.

Is it possible to care about your reputation and be your true self? Read for ideas about how to strike that elusive balance.

So many people I get along with are skeptical of CBT, and for good reasons. So why am I still a devotee?

“He never does anything besides show up and expect me to have gotten all the gifts and done all the work. He just sits in a corner, tuned out to everything that's going on.” Even for those of us who've done work to build relationships that don't fall into gender stereotypes…

How do you know if you’re a perfectionist? Is that even a real thing? Here’s how to think about this kind of label and understand the pros and cons of labels and diagnoses.

How did I get to be this way? Do I make any sense? And if I am a perfectionist, can I really be any different? The short answers are: it’s complicated (but the details are fascinating!) and YES! It is possible to feel better!

Feeling productive and motivated aren’t necessarily connected to status, money, or achievements. We feel motivated and productive when we’re satisfied with how we spend our time and have the energy to do more of it. You could feel productive and motivated by making a grilled cheese sandwich, taking a nap, or working on a spreadsheet.